September 11, 2003

9/11/'03: Well, today is

9/11/'03: Well, today is September 11. It still doesn't seem right- at work today I typed out that dateline at least 10 times, and it never felt right, not even the 10th time.
I think what makes me uneasy most of all is that so many people seem to have decided to "not make a big deal" about the anniversary, at least compared to last year. Last year, in the period around the 9/11 anniversary, the mood of Fall 2001 seemed to briefly return: the flags, shrines, and pictures of people seemed to make a sudden reappearance, and with it came the post-calamitous, introspective atmosphere that almost naturally caused everyone to put things in perspective, count their blessings, and everything else. And honestly, that was a vibe that always, in some weird way, made me feel good. That vibe is no where to be found this year; in Manhattan last night I saw almost no indication or acknowledgement of the anniversary, aside from the annual birthday dinner of my friend, who was born on September 10. It took renting the surprisingly good Spike Lee movie "The 25th Hour" to recreate the feeling of post-9/11 camaraderie.
Yes, I know most people who feel that we need to be "protected" from thinking about the horrors of that terrible day are well-intentioned, ever-sensitive, etc. But in the lack of attention (and, by extension) respect being paid on this anniversary is undercut, I feel, with a sense of "it's been two years, it's about time we got over it."
At any rate, I know that I have NOT "gotten over" the events of September 11, I'm NOT ready to "move on," and I'm not entirely certain that I ever will be. I'm upset today not so much as those knuckleheads who will use the occasion to scoff at the American flag ("ewww, that's so jingoistic!"), or to attempt to turn Osama Bin Laden into some type of Che Guevara figure whose goal in knocking down the Towers was to crush globalization and get the workers of the world to unite (even Noam Chomsky has said that Bin Laden wasn't motivated by globalization, and probably doesn’t even know what it is). No, today I am upset at those, whether in media or everyday life, who want to infantilize us, and keep us from commemorating this anniversary and honoring the victims the way they deserve.
I will not use today's events to attempt to push any type of political agenda. My personal commemoration included, at 8:50 this morning, excusing myself from work to go stand on the Hoboken pier and pay my respects to our fallen brothers and sisters. I'll watch the TV coverage tonight, just as on the day itself and in the weeks afterward, I found that I couldn't tear myself away from the TV until I felt I understood what exactly had occurred.
Also, as I have periodically in the last two years, tonight I'm planning to dig out Sports Illustrated's post-9/11 issue (adorned with an empty seat filled with an American flag, and headlined "The Week That Sports Stood Still"). That issue taught us the not-altogether-contradictory message that sports are both meaningless in the grand scheme of things, and restoratative in the way they help the community out of its collective doldrums. I'll also be reading Michele Catalano's "Voices" project- a wonderful collection of people's thoughts, prayers, and recollections of that day. And finally, I'll be making one more trip to the Hoboken pier today, for the return of the Tribute in Light.
My all those victims of September 11, and all those who lost their lives and the resulting War on Terror, continue to rest in peace.

Posted by Stephen Silver at September 11, 2003 11:23 AM
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