THE WHITE STUFF: I pay tribute once again to Weird Al Yankovic in sharing the news that the lawsuit seeking to outlaw Oreo cookies has been dropped. And it wasn't until now that I realized the doctor originally behind the suit had borrowed two-thirds of my name: Stephen Joseph. Now I know how Lisa Marie Presley feels about that actress who used to date Tim Burton.
But seriously, while I rarely eat Oreos anymore I have long felt a special kinship with them, whether it was eating whole boxes of Double Stuffs over the course of all-nighters in college, or it's an award-winning story I wrote in 5th grade about a ficticious baseball game between the "Baltimore Oreos" and "Hydrox White Sox"- probably the first extracurricular thing I remember writing, ever. So let's all be glad that Oreos will be remaining legal- we are now one step closer to the removal of tyranny from the United States.