Jordan is still going strong with the succubus stories/analysis, and he probably has enough to go on all year; meanwhile, the great Jim Knipfel weighs in with one of his own in this week’s (generally Jew-bashing-free) issue of New York Press.
Knipfel tells the story of how years ago in Philadelphia, he was dating a rather difficult young woman, and had to reconcile that with both his record collection and some of the more salacious stuff he was writing at the time for a local alt-weekly. Here’s Jim:
To say that the woman I was living with in Philly could be a little uptight about sexual issues would be generous. Not sex itself, but rather representations or discussions of sexual matters. It took the form of a kind of radical feminism gone haywire, and sometimes went far beyond even that…If she was around, I was not at liberty to watch any movies containing sex, sexual innuendo, boobs or women in revealing clothing—at least if I didn't want the evening to devolve into another big fight.
Reading this made me realize something. When I was high school and college, I knew all sorts of women who thought, talked, and acted like that. Now that I’m an adult living in a city, I know none. It’s not that I’m not friends with feminists, it’s just that I don’t even remember the last time I heard a female use the word “misogynistic” in a sentence, whereas five years ago I’d hear it every five minutes. Not necessarily in reference to myself, of course.
What’s caused the change? Has there been a cultural shift in the last few years, or are things just different for 20-somethings than they are in college? Indeed, do women undergo some sort of transformation once they escape the PC-beholden shackles of college, and start to realize that a lot of that women's studies stuff made a whole lot more sense in theory than in practice?
Maybe it’s the rise of the “Sex and the City”/"postfeminist princess” culture. Or maybe it’s that women, once they’re adults, realize that sex is a good thing, and that guys thinking they’re hot- rather than being insulting- is actually something they sort of like. As one friend of mine put it, “they all kind of realize how great sex can be after they have great sex.”
Then again, maybe I just went to college with the wrong women. Help me out here, ladies!
Then there’s this piece, asking why television teenagers (From “90210”’s Brenda to “Gilmore Girls”’ Rory) nearly always go straight from kissing to losing their virginity, skipping “second base” and “third base” altogether. Why, indeed?
Posted by Stephen Silver at May 26, 2004 11:06 PM2nd base and 3rd base are the most fun, too!
This was a very interesting post. Made me think. Maybe I'll post something on it later.
Posted by: red at May 27, 2004 09:24 AMI think it has to do with maturity and experience. A combination of latching onto the fact that men are the way they are and that will never change (when it comes to T&A, not Congress stripping away rights over our bodies) and also realizing the exploited women choose to do so, no one's putting a gun to their head- except maybe Linda Lovelace.... allegedly. Also finding out the catcalling idiots are just that and go home to their right hand every night anyway.
And about the base thing- there's something almost pure about going from kissing straight to fucking (in TV land, anyway). I think discussing/suggesting anything in between would take away from the character's virginal traits and move her to trollop status. Only sluts know about fingering.
Thanks for the linkylove, dude.
Yeah I agree there is something about just going straight to the sex that is kinda sexy, almost primal, Michael Douglas-like.
I think it has to do with the men that women happen to have in their lives. If they grow up or befriend "nice" guys (like you, partner!), the sexual proclivities are balanced out by the other good stuff the relationship has to offer. Once women reach adulthood (post-college), their ability to select their male companions and the range of opportunities for meeting them drastically increases as women date/work/network/barhop/fill it in. It is only the bitter women who don't broaden their field and end up calling every man or his habits "misogynistic."
On the 90210 front--TV ratings and the ability to hide skin. "Going all the way" sells, and actresses don't like to (or can't in primetime) show too much, so they start with kissing and end under the bedsheets.
well, i think all your theories have merit.
you and i definitely went to college with the wrong women ... if you can call them women at all.
and as far as 90210, i think the interim steps between making out and banging are implied.
Posted by: LilB at May 27, 2004 04:27 PM