Bill Simmons, with his best idea all year:
Watching football last Sunday with my friends, I brought up the topic, "What touchdown dance would cause the biggest possible fine?"Brilliant. It's too bad we probably won't see it anytime soon, because Moss has hardly scored any touchdowns this year. Posted by Stephen Silver at October 28, 2005 06:24 PMI think this one would be [the worst]: "The Delivery." What if Moss scored a TD and immediately fell to the ground on his back, with his legs up in the air like a pregnant woman, and two receivers stood on either side "cheering him on," and Randy pretended he was pushing, and finally the QB leaned over him and "pulled" the football from Randy's loins, then held the football to his shoulder like a baby for a few seconds before Moss stood up, gingerly grabbed the "baby," cut an imaginary umbilical cord, then spiked the ball as hard as he possibly could? I think that would be like a three-game suspension and a $500,000 fine, right? Plus, Buck would be more distraught than Walter Cronkite after JFK's assassination.