February 25, 2008

The Case Against Gargamel

This hilarious Cracked list of the 7 Most Powerful Wizards (Too Lazy to Use Their Powers) seems to want to have it both ways when it comes to the Smurfs. It first says of Skelator:

Essentially a nude, muscular Smurf with a yellow skull for a head... If you're into nude men who like to ride around on giant cats then your entertainment options were pretty much limited to He-Man and the Masters of the Universe.
But then the writer unleashes the following attack on Smurfs villain Gargamel:
Gargamel is a hermit "wizard" who is the Smurfs' main antagonist. At various times he either wants to capture the Smurfs and use them as part of a potion that creates gold, or he wants to eat them. The Smurfs are a versatile resource for Gargamel... If successful wizarding were baseball, Gargamel would be the White Sox. His only goal in life is to capture the Smurfs and since all Smurfs are roughly the size of squirrels and subsist almost entirely on a diet of Smurfberries, one would conclude that a basic knowledge of mousetraps would do the trick.

Instead, Gargamel, with the entire arsenal of potions from the wizarding world at his disposal, launches infuriatingly complicated Rube Goldbergian magical schemes, and completely fails every single time.

Being outsmarted by a Smurf is like being outsmarted by one of your shoes.

Posted by Stephen Silver at February 25, 2008 04:42 PM
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