July 27, 2010

KHAAAAAAAAN!

I haven't been commenting much on the pile-up on Timberwolves GM David Kahn, mostly because I'm not that into the team anymore, and because, with the exception of the laughable Darko contract, I can sort of see what Kahn's trying to do.

Still, I enjoyed this movie idea from Simmons in Friday's mailbag:

A die-hard Minnesota fan tortured by years of losing finally snaps after bumbling Wolves general manager David Kane (played by Greg Kinnear) signs overrated franchise player Ruben Tugg (played by Drake) to a franchise-crippling $120 million deal, then vows on a sports radio show to murder Tugg in the 10 days leading up to July 15 (when Tugg can officially sign the contract), prompting Minneapolis police to send rising star detective Jennie Jamieson (played by Megan Fox) to protect Tugg for those last 10 days and, of course, Tugg and Jamieson end up falling for each other, much to the chagrin of Jennie's boss (Bunk from "The Wire"). At the end of the movie, the fan somehow gets into the news conference and tries to shoot Tugg, taking down Kane instead, and eventually gets pardoned by the judge (a longtime Wolves fan) for saving the franchise. I like this concept because it could be a real movie (like a cross between "The Fan," "Big Fan" and "The Bodyguard") or a Skinemax thriller (and if that's the case, we'll make Jennie and her boss a divorced couple, leading to the climactic sex scene when they get back together at the end). The title of the movie? "Expired Contract."
The only major motion picture about a Minnesota sports franchise is "Little Big League," where a kid becomes the manager (and owner!) of the Twins. "Expired Contract" sounds much better.

Posted by Stephen Silver at July 27, 2010 09:02 PM
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