July 14, 2005

Ombuds This!

Blogger Mac Thomason too has noticed the precipitous decline of ESPN, and has decided to chronicle it with a “tournament” called the Road From Bristol. In it, he pits the network’s most annoying personalities against one another, with biting asides. My personal favorites:

Mike Lupica: Possibly the most arrogant person ever on ESPN, which is saying something.

Jeff Brantley: King of the mullet people.

Jim Gray: So evil he made the country sympathize with Pete Rose.

Trev Alberts: What kind of name is "Trev", anyway?

The #1 seeds are Stephen A. Smith, Stuart Scott, Chris Berman, and Dick Vitale. But I’d pick Sean Salisbury as the favorite over all of them. As a commenter of Bill’s asked today, “Who's that NFL analyst that looks like a fetus?”

And speaking of talentless sportscasters, the following exchange took place during last week’s episode of Bob Costas’ HBO show, when Bob was leading a panel of Mike Schmidt, Tiki Barber, and Jimmy Roberts:

Costas: “Mike, you played with both Tim McCarver and Joe Morgan. When you watch a game announced by one of them, do you actually learn anything?”

Schmidt, Barber, and Roberts, practically in unison: “Absolutely not.”

Posted by Stephen Silver at July 14, 2005 12:32 AM
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