SteveSilver.net

The Reid Emporium

All sorts of damning revelations came yesterday when Andy Reid's two sons were sentenced to 23 months in jail each on drug and gun charges, as well as violating probation, and multiple car accidents.

- The judge chided the Reids for failing to provide structure for their sons, also likening their home to a "drug emporium" (not to be confused with the mostly-defunct West Coast drugstore chain that uses that name.

- It hadn't been reported until yesterday, but police reportedly found steroids, as well as heroin, at the Reid home. The news every NFL coach dreams of hearing! Now there'll be a league investigation into what Andy knew about that.

- Garrett Reid also "enjoyed being the rich kid who dealt drugs in poor, violent Philadelphia neighborhoods." How a pasty white kid managed that, without it quickly becoming public knowledge that Andy Reid's son was selling drugs, remains a mystery. They must take that "Stop Snitching" stuff very seriously. Another reason it's too bad "The Wire" is ending- they could have introduced a new character, an upstart West Baltimore drug dealer who's the son of the Ravens' head coach. They could give him a name like "Ziggy Billick."

- Most gruesomely of all is this nugget, about Garrett Reid: "Authorities... found 89 prescription drug pills in Reid's jail cell Thursday morning. They believe he smuggled them in his rectum when he was jailed earlier this week." I mean, I guess this shows that I have no conception of what drug addiction is like. Because there isn't a single substance I can think of- no food, no drug, no nothing- that I need to have so much that I'd be willing to 1) shove it up my ass, 2) after it's been up my ass, ingest it, and 3) Do this not one time, but 89 times.

- And finally, everyone's been saying that Andy might resign from the Eagles after this season in order to "spend more time with his family" or "deal with his family situation." First of all, he won't be "spending time" with either of his sons, since they'll be in jail for the next two years. Second, they're already in jail, so what more could he do while out of a job? And third, the sons are in jail in Philadelphia, so I can't imagine Andy wanting to leave Philly to be in another city. My guess is he sticks around.

Posted by Stephen Silver at November 2, 2007 04:53 PM